The Meaning of Love

Brief Title:

Characters:
Finesse, Leyu Yashida

Scene Runner/Watcher:

IC Date:
09/05/12 10:49

Location:
Xavier MedBay

Summary:
Leyu and Jeanne have a discussion about love amongst other things

Social or Plot:

TS:
No

Log:
It certainly seems as if Dr. Leyu Yashida has toned down of late, a good bit less erratic or startling in appearance, attire or attitude here in the medbay. Of course, that might have a lot to do with the paucity of hours she has been putting in of late. With no serious medical issues, she has spent only a bare handful of hours here in recent weeks despite the professed importance of this genetic research. She has spent quite a bit of time in her office up on the ground floor, as one of the new Deans of Students for the school's ongoing reorganization. But even more, she has spent a great deal of time off-campus. Rumor has it that she has spent quite a bit of time in Mutant Town at the medical clinic there, and with the team investigating their new base of operations, the Ship. Of course, it is also known that Sybil Dvorak, aka. the Gypsy Moth, has left the Mansion for parts unknown. And given how attached to Sybil Leyu seemed to be getting before she left, that has to have been a blow to her.

At the moment, Leyu is hunched over a monitor, examining data models of several genetic sequences. She looks a tad bleary-eyed. She is wearing her knee-length white lab coat. In clear evidence, however, there are no high heels or platforms. Just simple, sensible roan flats. And a white poplin blouse collar peeks out at her neck.

Finesse has been helping on and off in medbay, using her skills to reduce some of the work load of those fully certified doctors. In between helping, she's also taking to using the lab's equipment for her own purposes. As she steps to the lab this time, she only needs a brief look at Leyu, before she can say, "welcome back, Dr. Yashida." Clearly, Finesse has noted that things are more normal than they have been, as far as Leyu's attire is concerned. "So what happened?"

A bit distracted by what she is concentrating on, Leyu glances up at the sound of Jeanne's voice, taking a moment to focus her gaze instead on a person, not a computer model. "Mmm? Hello, Jeanne. What do you mean, what happened?" Is she supposed to just spill her guts and tell her intern about her love life - or lack thereof? Certainly not without a better prompt, it seems.

"Well, for a while there you were dressing and behaving in a manner most unlike you," Finesse points out as she moves to sit in a free computer console. "As you're now far more professionally dressed, I figured whatever ailed you has passed, I was just curious if it was a virus of some sort."

Leyu chuckles wryly, shaking her head a bit. "It wasn't a virus, Jeanne. Though I suppose some might say it was a 'sickness' in a way. Falling in love is often viewed that way from those on the outside." She taps a few keys, saving her work, and then settles back in her chair, rubbing at her eyes as she tries to relax a bit. "A friend tried to help me 'relax' and open myself up to new experiences. When that friend was taken away, I embraced what she had offered me, as a way of trying to show my support for her, and as a way of keeping my connection to her. When she was finally returned to us, I continued doing so because I knew it pleased her to see me so, and pleasing her made me happy."

Leyu sighs a bit. "Now, my friend is gone. I do not know if she shall ever return, given why she left this time. I could keep dressing as I was, but it would not bring her pleasure anymore, and would have no bearing on her return. Given my new duties here at the school, and elsewhere, I felt it would likely be best to return to a more professional demeanor and attire." That explains it all, right?

"A virus would have concerned me because there would be a probability I could catch it, I would hate it," Jeanne points out outright, in a round-about way stating that Leyu was an embarrassment by her standards the way she was before. "Falling in love? Is that what happened to you? I hope I never fall in love then, the likelihood for that is pretty low as it is." Swiveling in her chair so she fully faces Leyu, Jeanne looks at her curiously, "why do you feel dressing or behaving in a certain manner would have any affect whatsoever on your connection with another person?"

"I'm sorry your friend is gone, Leyu," but the way Jeanne says the words seem like she doesn't care one bit, then again, it could entirely be that she doesn't really know what a friend is, beyond the definition of the word in the dictionary. "So you were trying to please another? Changing oneself to please another is a weak quality."

Leyu watches Jeanne, and cannot help but shake her head a bit, perhaps sadly or in bewilderment. "I hope, Jeanne, that you do not get your wish, dear. I hope that someday you will know what it is to love, and be loved in return. There is nothing more magical and special in life than that." She smiles a bit bittersweetly. "Wearing the clothes she bought for me, the clothes she wanted me to experience, made me feel closer to her, and reminded me of her and our time together. That helped me connection to her, and her to me." Leyu is pretty convinced of this, even if no one else is.

"Thank you for saying so, even if you really don't feel it." Leyu offers, honestly. It's nice to hear it, even given that Jeanne really has no emotion behind it all. Even snark might be easier to take. Maybe. "I was not merely trying to please another. I was exploring different styles, learning more about myself, about what I felt like wearing them, which I liked and which I did not. That it also pleased my friend was a wonderful side benefit. But I did not become someone I am not. I explored things I never had in my life. now I know things about myself I did not. I will always think foldly of her because of that."

"It is entirely useless to me. There is no rational root for love, it is a state of intoxciation, much like being drunk. One is not in control of themselves under that neuro-chemical affect." Shrugging, Jeanne doesn't seem convinced, "you know that there is nothing of her essence in those clothes, it's just your mind playing wishful tricks on you."

"At least you had someone who was fond of you, I guess it is a good feeling for the ego," Jeanne offers her version to how being liked could be beneficial, "heighted self worth leads to better performance."

"You know how I define a miracle? My definition holds the observer hasn't sufficient understanding of the technology involved, and thus relates to divine intervention." She stops to look a moment at Leyu, before adding, "great cosmic powers aside, they do appear as miracles, though I trust with sufficent study we can find how they operate as anything else in this universe." Jeanne remains silent for a while after the last thing Leyu said, clicking away on the keys, before eventually coming to a halt. She stares at the screen emptily, and then relates to Leyu, "my parents always told me how special I was to them, and yet they only used me to gain awards, money and prestige. Did I mention they were criminals?"

Leyu approaches from her own desk, staying behind Jeanne, lifting her hand to rest it gently on the other woman's shoulder. "No, you hadn't mentioned that. Not to me, at least. And I am sorry for the pain and betrayal you must feel about that. But I want you to know that not everyone is like that." She leans down, whispering in Jeanne's ear. "And I genuinely hope that we never know exactly how and why love forms, because that would rob a precious miracle of its power and specialness. And I think it best for humanity - in all its myriad forms - that never happens."

Jeanne looks surprised that Leyu cares enough to get up and put a hand on her shoulder, and she seems a bit at a loss as far as what to do in this situation, looking up awkwardly at Leyu. "It's okay, I had many talents, I was a means for a better life for them. I understand why they did what they did," of course she neglects to mention the part where she doubts her father was at all her real father for now. "It's why I joined the Olympic Gymnastic Team, and it's why I went to MIT at a very young age, to get away from my parents." Jeanne makes no comment about Leyu's expectation that love is never fully realized, it is not that interesting a topic of research for her anyway.

Leyu doesn't expect a big reaction to her presence and touch, and she doesn't get it. "Kids aren't supposed to be about the benefits they offer their parents. They're supposed to be blessings, much loved simply for existing, Jeanne. I am sorry you never got to know that kind of happiness and belonging." In her own way, Leyu too was denied that, but in a different way. She at least knew it could exist, even if it was often held hostage for her. "Your value as a person is not in your talents."

"I've heard people say that before, Leyu, I just can't say I understand why. I wouldn't have understood if my parents hadn't taken advantage of my abilities, it's easier to understand why they did take advantage of what I had to offer." Jeanne once again moves in circles around the subject of love, showing her utter cluelessness when it comes to it, no matter in what form. "What other value is there to a person than what they can and cannot do to help themselves, or a group they affiliate with?"

Leyu actually bends her knees, bringing herself down to Jeanne's level so that she can look the girl in the eyes. If nothing else, Jeanne's ability to read others should show her Leyu is being as honest with her she knows how to be, as she says, "I know you can't understand why, Jeanne. And I think that is a shame, something I would long to see changed if I could be figure out how." She smiles, bittersweetly. "The value of a person has nothing to do with what they can do, to help themselves or to help others. They are special and precious no matter what. If nothing else, their greatest value is in what they can inspire in others by knowing them."

Jeanne looks into Leyu's eyes as she bends down to her level, and it seems she chooses to say nothing this time, as she contemplates what Leyu says. She sure seems to be speaking truthfully, even if Jeanne doesn't necessarily agree. But at least Leyu isn't being condescending like some guidance counslers and psychologists she was taken to in the past. "Maybe one day I'll see it myself...for now I don't have a reason to believe that. Maybe I can be proven wrong, even if it's not likely."

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